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tv   The Daily Show With Jon Stewart  Comedy Central  January 22, 2014 7:30pm-8:01pm PST

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from comedy central's world news headquarters in new york, this is "the daily show" with jon stewart. ["daily show" theme song playing] [cheers and applause] >> jon: boom. welcome to "the daily show." my name is jon stewart. man, gi guest tonight author theresa payton. she's here to talk about big data and how your every waking move and thought are in no way being tracked by our faceless corporate overlords. hey, welcome to frozen the disney see feature starring the snowman. not a good time in new york city
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right now. but first a propos the sochi winter olympics has opened its arms to the world, 90% of world. >> in rush hat is host of 2014 winter olympics the targeting of abuse against homosexuals is among the worst in the world. >> >> jon: there's a 2014 olympic tourism motto russia where the police don't always help the people beating you. [laughter] clearly russia isn't just getting up for the games but making a strong bid to win gold at a concurrent global competition! ♪ >> i knew there was something suspicious. the great thing about the
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homophobic olympics just like the olympics every nation can take part. like jamaica with a bobshred team or saudi arabia competed in women's beach volleyball. very warm. [laughter] let's go around the globe and meet this year's homophobic hopefuls ins a yanch india has criminalized homosexuality. offenders can be sent to jail for ten years. >> jon: yes because traditional indian culture has always held that sex is meant to be between a man and a woman whose apparently being suspended by two other women wearing nipple chains over the penis of the man who is upside down at the time -- [laughter] -- white thoughtfully massaging the assistant woman's genitalia. [ laughter ] not that weird gay (bleep). [ laughter ] ten years in prison for committing gay acts clearly wins india a place in this year's
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homophobic competition. the real action is in the african qualifying groups where two countries are battling it out for the last spot. >> gay people in high nigeria ce jailed for gathering with each other. parting or meeting associates whatsoever. >> jon: strong opening move. good news for nigeria's homophobe team. bad news for lagos production of kinky boots. i don't really know if that is happening. in nigeria gay people can't even meet up. how do you top that? >> uganda recently passed a bill that makes homosexuality a crime punishable by life in prison. >> jon: and uganda takes the lead by moving backyards. nigeria are going to tolerate that? >> anyone who helps a gay person or patronizes or operates a gay organization can be prosecuted.
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>> jon: what the (bleep)! [laughter] not just gay people anybody who helps -- they are not just going after will, now they are going after grace. [ laughter ] nigeria -- [ applause ] -- yes, i believe they are applauding. i remember that show. [ laughter ] nigeria on their way but still clearly the gay phobic country to beat this year is mother russia. they have homefield advantage and a star who has been making a real name for himself vladmir putin a man equally at home horseback riding or hunting or speaking at a funeral. [ laughter ] another thing i'll always remember about grandpa. what a contrast in styles burr to see. the african brand of homophobia aggressive, slashing.
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the russians more strategic, they are chess players, subtler, almost seeming to disavow their anti-gay bias until the last second. >> we aren't banning anything. we have no criminal punishment for such relations. >> jon: there's vladmir putin gorgeous head fake and now let's watch him drop the hammer. >> one can feel relaxed and at ease plu b.u. please leave the -- but please leave the children at peace. >> jon: that has leave -- what the hell was that putin? that's like me saying we have no rub brob russians just please if you come here don't (bleep) our bears. [ laughter ] we love russians they are very nice people. [laughter] just we like our bears not to be penetrated by russian penises. [ laughter ] but it is -- it is a good point, vladmir, when you say please leave the children in peace.
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what would be an example of that? would you not want to walk up to a small boy you have never met, lift up his shirt and maybe kiss his bare torso? is that the creepy behavior we're talking about? we're joined by assif mandvi in sochi right now. assif thank you for being here. >> thank you, jon. >> jon: wow that is some really impressive homophobia showcased throughout. >> looks as though mother russia is in complete control of this competition but don't count out america's homophonea. team usa has been regressing all winter and i think we have a shot. >> jon: i have to tell you assif in other years i would say, yes, but this year with this level of competition there's no way. the african countries, russia is too strong. >> ye of little bigotry. we have a strong field.
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reality star juan pablo of the bachelor. there's a thing about gay people that it stinks to me -- why know -- grace had friends but they are more per vent in a sense. >> usa! >> jon: you stack that up against life imprisonment i don't seen see that guy making the finals. >> to be fair the glaring gap is not his event. check out his entry in the 100 meter backtrack. >> he released a statement on his facebook page saying the word pervert was not what i meant to say. i meant to say gay people are more affectionate and more intense and for a segment of this tv audience this would be too racy to accept. >> jon: too racy to accept. the (bleep) guy is on the bachelor. he is saying two people of same gender falling in love is too racy?
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americans prefer seeing a dude serially banging 20 girls he just met in a hot tub to whittle them down to the one he will ultimately break up with via tabloid magazine. >> right, traditional marriage. >> jon: right. does team usa have any other strong pos perfect inspects? >> a utah man is promising to go without any food until the state stop as lug same-sex marriages. he survived for two weeks only on water and an occasional vitamin. >> it's a level of commitment to homofeebphobiaa that weapon haven't -- homophobia that weapon haven't seen since ghandi. >> jon: i thought he was protesting the british occupation of india? >> i think i would know what he was protesting, okay. >> jon: random nut jobs around the country displaying ignorance? >> there's a lot of hate throughout. >> jon: it's dissipating and rapidly.
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i don't think we're going to medal this year. >> don't you count us out. don't you give up on us, pony boy. >> jon: sorry pony boy? suddenly it's the outsiders? all right. we're running out of time, assif. it's going to take a lake placid hockey like mere doll pull it out. >> wait, what is that? oh, jon we've got a late goal from the governor of pennsylvania. this could be the one, role it, chuck. >> there was a controversy remark made by a member of your legal team talking about gay marriage and 12 year olds -- >> it was inappropriate. i think a better analogy would be brother and sister, don't you. >> do you believe in ignorance? sa!jon: we can do it usa!
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>> welcome back! you know, there has been a lot after tension paid recently to the mistreatment of our he returning war veterans. one group has avoided that because they have not been treated at all. >> jason jones reports on the challenges facing the veterans of the vietnam war. >> when vietnam vets returned home they were ostracized,
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called unspeakable things, even spit on. sadly that continues today. >> it has been hell. >> we are stigmaized and excluded. >> being a veteran is like a second class citizen. >> let me get the problem here, hippies do you want to beat some up? >> no. >> trust me you smack them around with a baseball bat they won't think it's see -- so groovy. >> it's not the hippies. who are you angry with? >> the military. >> i'm mad at the military because we're going through post traumatic stress and the military has turned their backs on us. >> it's estimated 500,000 vets got ptsd in vietnam yet hundreds of themes of them are ineligible for treatment which raises a fascinating question: what the (bleep)? >> a bad discharge. >> a bad discharge prohibits us from being eligible for a lot of things we would normal i will be
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entitled to. >> how do you get that less than honorable discharge? >> ptsd we got in vietnam. >> i guess my follow up question would be: are you (bleep) serious? >> most definitely serious. >> let me get this straight: these guys went to vietnam? >> that's correct. >> where they got to ptsd. >> yes. >> which led to them getting less than honorably discharged. >> definitely. >> and now they can't get treatment on account of discharge they got from vietnam. >> that's correct. >> i feel like there's a military term for that. and one other thing: the military says vietnam vets couldn't have had ptsd in the 70s because they didn't officially diagnose it until the 80s based off of studies, wait for it -- vietnam vets. is it possible to get ptsd from
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an interview? >> there's a lot of anger there. >> if you don't do something you are going to explode. >> what do you do? >> sometimes i feel like i want to punch and kick. >> let p me try that. -- let me try that. [yelling] noel noel [grunting] >> hey, man, you have to chill! [laughter] [grunting] >> yeah, that didn't work. >> yeah, i still feel really angry. do you have anything else? >> well, i would rather hide in the closet. >> excuse me. >> don't hurt me. >> okay this broom closet was not helping but there was something that would. lawyers from the yale law school
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filed a class action suit on the vets behalf. this was going to get me out of this pathetic state. this was an outrageous situation. we've seen many cases where records are not available and military says there's no evidence that.ted is from the medical records that -- that the ptsd from the medical records the military lost. >> i don't want to do this anymore. read the glib insensitive questions yourself. >> is ptsd one of those madeup diseases like peanut allergies? every kid in my son's class has a peanut allergy. when did this happen? >> it's a good tag but i'm not laughing. >> of course the vets do have one simple resource. >> what they need to do is get discharges upgraded. >> it's easy all they have to do is get the dod to recognize the disease existed before 1980. >> that's right. >> which would explain why their less than honorable discharges were actually honorable.
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>> that's exactly right. >> and fill out 600 forms on top after this. easy. >> it's a nightmare. i've been 13 years to get my upgrade and somebody marked disapproved. >> how do you keep going? >> i've been fighting over 40 years and i'll continue to fight. >> if these guys could fight for 40 years, i could get out of my disgusting bathrobe and train them myself in bureaucratic warfare. >> every line, every box will be filled in with meticulous detail. if there was anybody courageous enough for the unbearable mission it would be these guys. now the hardest part called waiting. guns and ammo for you and vanity fair for you because it's all we had in the lobby. let me see you wait. for the department of defense to get its head out of its
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[ applause ] >> jon: welcome back. my guest tonight soon internet security expert who is also the white house chief information officer from 2006 to 2008. she has coauthored a new book called "privacy in the age of big data." please welcome to the program theresa payton. [cheers and applause] hello. thank you for being here. >> thanks for having me.
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>> jon: it's a shame -- a shame -- ms. payton that this is not a more relevant topic. really. >> yeah. >> jon: could there be anything with these n.s.a. revelations and everything going on. how long have you been working on this project? >> almost a year. >> jon: and how long have they known that you were work on it? >> immediately. >> jon: probably before you were working on it. >> probably before i knew it myself. >> jon: in your mind what is the largest threat to either our privacy or security through these issues? >> you know, i think it's the not knowing when data is collected about you so that you can have a voice in saying wait a minute, did i give you permission to collect that and how are you going to protect it? you have people in the uk trying to be good citizens throwing trash away and their phones scanned as they are throwing trash away. did they know that? >> jon: wait, when you are throwing in, the trash guys are
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scanning it. how are they scanning their phones? >> they had a little reader on the crash can so as long as they had proximity to you are your phone they were able to throw away your phone -- scan your phone as they -- >> jon: who did that? >> a marketing company. >> jon: get the hell out of here. >> yeah. >> jon: if you live in this world unless you were going off the grid and god forbid shop at a bricks and morear. i mean -- mortar i mean it's not going to -- how do you avoid it? >> i think part of it is just understanding some of the things that you can do to protect yourself. for example in the case of the phone, now of course this takes a smart phone and turns it into a dumb phone but you can turn off location, wifi, bluetooth so you are not broadcasting to everybody who you are and where you are. >> jon: why not call them from home where the kitchen phone had the wire where could you walk to the living room. >> but the fridge might be watching you and sending out text messages.
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>> jon: this is the point, it can always be used by nefarious individuals or groups, but it is part of the way we live now. it is as though highways were also fraught with piracy. that's the type of thing we're dealing with. >> it is. one of the things i hope people take away from the book. i really want people to be informed and engaged and some people who read it early on said i'm also enraged but you really want people to talk away p -- take away from this on just because you can collect the data, should you? and how long should you store it for? because chances are criminals will hack the data. it's not yours it's about you and me. >> jon: and figure out how to do that. what is a more dangerous entity the more criminal mischief makers, corporate marketing, or government snooping? >> you know, it's really kind of criminal element because, you
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know, corporate thinks they are doing it to help you, to give you a better experience, a better product. the government thinks they are doing it to help you to gift you better security to protect you. the cyber criminals want your data and your life and they want to take over that information. that is really the element that i think if we can all band together and say, let's not collect and store data indefinitely and let's think differently about what we collect and how we use it because the bad guys are going to get it. >> jon: how are you going do that because the other two entities are doing it for a good reason. that's the only reason we're keeping it forever. they are saying we need to do this to protect you and these guys are saying that presents us with opportunity? >> i think it's a naive response. >> jon: that's because i thought of it. [laughter] that happens to be my mo. >> i think you are asking the right question which is what ted and i were hoping would happen with this book, which is wait a
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minute, i know you are doing it for good intent but since we know all databases can be hacked, the pentagon has been hacked, the big name intelligence agencies have all had issues, every piece of technology is hackable. knowing that how do you want to protect that data? >> jon: perhaps then if only they would have the conversation about what is the efficacy of big data? if the government said here is how it works these algorithms. if corporations said don't you like ads that only go to you with things you also already like then maybe we could have the conversation. right now it seems like it just happens to us. >> it does just happen to us. we talk about for example target figured out with big data they know you are pregnant before you know or before you are telling people. not you personally obviously but -- [laughter] >> jon: with target sure because who would ever hack into
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those guys that data is -- they know how to protect stuff. >> that data is secure. >> jon: on that note -- this is the discussion of the era. so smack in the middle of it there. privacy in the age of big data. it's on the bookshelves now. theresa payton. [cheers and applause]
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jon: that's our show. here it is your moment of zen. >> i want to be clear to say to the folks i'm not saying
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president obama is the anti-christ. i'm sure he is not because the ♪ i'm going down to south park, gonna have myself a time ♪ ♪ friendly faces everywhere ♪ humble folks without temptation ♪ ♪ going down to south park, gonna leave my woes behind ♪ ♪ ample parking day or night ♪ people spouting, "howdy, neighbor" ♪ ♪ heading on up to south park, gonna see if i can't unwind ♪ ♪ mrph rmhmhm rm! mrph rmhmhm rm! ♪ ♪ come on down to south park and meet some friends of mine ♪